Friends

Music:

There are some things that I cannot live without. One of them is music.

For as long as I can remember, my life has been defined by music--from the earliest lullabies my mother or my yaya used to sing to me, to the film scores, to the classic tales of love from my Lolo's vinyl records, to almost anything that pleases me.

I tried a string of musical instruments, but like any attempt which is done half-heartedly I ended up failing. My first was the harmonica. I then did the keyboard/organ, the guitar, the trumpet, the xylophone, the flute, among others until such time I found myself playing the piano.

But I grew impatient. Not listening to mentors. settled with no instrument and begged my ears won't stop appreciating music instead since I myself can't pluck a tune or push a key.

When I realized that I am not as good as Mozart nor Beethoven (yes, I used to listen to classical music before 1995), I continued compiling records as in cassette tapes which I started way back when I was just 6. You would have imagined how huge my library would be right now if I still have them. Sadly, on that fateful day in 1995, everything in our home got washed out because of the flash flood. It was sudden. And several hours later, my photos, my books, my PC--all my belongings were pulled out of the house by the firemen who came and shoved out all the dirt, silt, grime, whatever-you-call-it out of the house, off the wall, into the veranda.

Soon after that, I realized how much I've lost. Starting that day, every piece of me was taken away one by one. It was not until during my third year in high school that I realized that I was losing myself. I no longer loved music as much as I did. I tried, but I learned how to be a conformist. My preference was already dictated by popular music. From being an aggressive little twit, I grew up to be a shadow, an invisible ghost.

But it was also that time when I started gaining friends. Funny, I used to think people are like pawns--they are dispensable; that their existence is nothing more but to supplement mine. Yes, I was a bit egotistical, but like every villain who learns how to love--my friends became my weakness. It was then that I realized that the milestones in my life is marked by the people I am with, and not by my achievements.

Yes, I miss my friends. I miss those afternoons with ourselves scattered about in the sala, or in my bedroom, or at my house in Eroreco. I miss the nights when all we did was talk till the wee hours while gulping a bottle of beer. Those early morning wakefulness to buy some pieces of pan de sal, have coffee with Andy, wait for Jessie to come by, stop Sonny's cell phone from screaming, wait for Meko's return home, Pani's occasional visits.

Then the afternoon would come and Hannah would call up, driving by with Sol and Raph to go to Claire's and visit Bianca. There were times when Pammy and Jed and Armi would pick me up to go some place else.

Of course, there were my never-before-seen friends. Nicole tops the list, there's Edison, Ai, Moi, and Ryan. And how can I forget? Jong and Dave, my rather Bohemian slash goth friends.

I don't have any more time to blog off, so I'll stop here.