Britney sang one, if not the most, horrible covers of all time. I heard it on the radio: a promotional ad for her first and most successful album to date. At first I kinda was a bit excited. Course she was gonna sing in a cappela. The world wanted to hear that. But when she started on the very first note of Journey's Open Arms (which was later on covered by the unstoppable Mariah Carey), I almost threw myself across the room, pricked my ears with unsharpened Mongol pencils, twisted my neck off my body and stuck it up my ass where all I'll ever hear is the muted sound of fecal movements and my guts regurgitating. I don't need to elaborate. You get the gist.
Decades later, she's still at it. Yet up until now her life isn't published in Marketing books or made as a prime example of one hella good marketing strategy. Yes, by all means, Britney is a product of the most brilliant promotional assholes--pro'ly far more better than the ones they have at the Pentagon. She's one global conspiracy that married thrice (was it?), birthed twice (?), and had the guts to expose the corruptions of General Vulva, Major Labia, and Pubis Amoure.
Despite everything unfortunate that had happened to her, it's then safe to say that cliched line "she's a force to be reckoned with"? Well, definitely. She's entertainment. Pro'ly the only real entertainer if George Clooney is the last real actor on earth.
The video for her third single "Break the Ice" premiered on BlackoutBall.com She's featured as an anime superheroine complete with all the tight-fitting, body-hugging overalls typical of a Britney video. Doesn't that make her even more two-dimensional than she already is?
But I think it's awesome. One thing that really impresses me about her is that despite her life getting fucked up so much, she can still stand up live onstage and do muscle contractions.
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